Chapter 8 - What Are You Saying?
A BOOK IN A BLOG PROJECT
Chapter 8 - What Are You Saying?
BY PATRICK HO
Humans like to talk. In fact, we must talk. Without communication - oral or written - there is no understanding, no learning, and ultimately, no progress.
When the first human developed language, I wonder how long that process took? And was English the first language invented?
An excerpt from Wikipedia states: “Writing first appeared in the Near East at the end of the 4th millennium BC.” (Source: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_languages_by_first_written_account )
My guess is there are likely languages that predate this, still undiscovered or forever unknown to mankind. Funnily enough, English was certainly not the first, but here we are - me writing in English, and you, the reader, reading in this language!
The Balance of Speech
Talking is essential, whether we are certain of the facts or not. Life, after all, is a balancing act; nothing is permanent, including our certainty.
But senseless talk is what we truly need to watch out for. What one person says may be incomprehensible or misunderstood by another. This often has a lot to do with intelligence, obviously. One does not need a PhD to grasp that.
I have had countless moments in my own life where I said silly things or repeated an unverified tale. In my early twenties, the term "filter" hardly existed in the social lexicon. I must apologize and pray that my aging brain doesn’t grow foggier and cause more damage, though eventually, it will fade away.
What's the best way to avoid talking nonsense at a coffee shop gathering? Either say nothing, say little, or don't interact socially at all. The last option is about detachment, which I will explore in another chapter.
Without reading, writing, and oral communication, how can humans evolve? How do we bond meaningfully, remain mentally sharp, and fuel the creativity that invents life-saving technologies? How do we make the world a better place for all?
Even this book arose from a conversation with a sifu who recognized my writing talents, not forgetting the many who encouraged me after reading the first few chapters when they were a ‘Book In A Blog’ project.
While the majority are able to speak, let’s spare a thought for those who cannot. That is why I have always found sign language to be one of the most important inventions ever created by man. Perhaps it’s time for me to take an online course!
Thankfully, advancements in mobile applications have provided many tools that make communication easier for the deaf and the blind. Let’s be grateful and thankful for the brilliant minds in this world, past and present.
When Ego Speaks
Let's be honest: most of us love the sound of our own voice.
This behavior is largely driven by ego. I mean, who doesn't love to shout out their achievements or feel like the center of attention in the entire Universe?
Another reason is loneliness. When a human being hasn't interacted verbally for a long time, there's a higher chance they might talk all sorts of nonsense. They may try to impress others for fear of losing a friend, or to gain the admiration of someone they value.
That's normal. It’s part of human nature. But do not allow attachment to creep in to avoid unnecessary complications, if possible.
Consider the seniors mingling at coffee shops. They are past achievers in their own capacities and worlds, now enjoying their golden years. They endured the demands of providing for their families, building careers, and perhaps losing all the glory. Their children may not be with them. Most carry scars from their suffering, emerging from storms that have developed their personality and behavior.
The majority now have time and are absorbed into the new world of social media, or SOCMED for short. The devices in their hands empower their knowledge, fulfill their joy from music and songs, and allow them to read the news and watch videos.
The danger, however, is that many do not realize that a lot of news and videos are fake or A.I. - generated. Recently, many seniors have been scammed of their savings, duped by ‘get-rich-quick’ schemes. Yes, there are evil-doers who prey on the old and the weak. (At the time of writing, I am 55 years old, living in Kuala Lumpur, Malaysia, and I no longer pick up calls from unknown numbers.)
While sipping their coffee, most seniors will talk about the past - the wonderful golden years. They remember fallen friends and colleagues, beautiful moments with family, raising children, winning a sports competition, the best car they owned, office tales, and so on.
Then there are those who just talk non-stop, sounding like the world's only supercomputer with every piece of information available to pass on!
If you encounter such people, just listen calmly, and reply only if you have to. If they are talking nonsense, do not react or be affected by what they say. Not replying cuts off their attachment to your words and limits the dynamic.
Power is often silent
I once met a guy at a bar during a seniors association meeting. Let’s call him Mr. Jake. He was in his mid-70s with a little grey hair.
While my chatty friend was talking away, I noticed Jake just sat calmly, sipping his beer, and listening intently. Even when my friend stopped talking, Jake never said a word. He only spoke when someone introduced themselves or tried to interact with him directly.
It was an impressive moment, to say the least. How can someone be so silent after a few beers?! Jake not only stayed silent for most of the three hours but he never sang nor danced.
He had a stoic aura. I knew I had met a person with a special gift, or power.
He reminded me to observe my own speech and actions - to stay calm even when the world is a noisy place.
That’s why I always advise people that we never stop learning until our time on Earth is up. I am still learning.
chapter were designed as a basic guide. Individuals who suffer from mental health issues, or are overly stressed from work and life's challenges are advised to seek professional medical help.
Comments